My whole life was spent longing to see my birth place. My parents lived in Alaska in the late 80's and I was born here. I wish I had some pictures of them from back then to share! But they're all at my mom's house, packed neatly away. Maybe I'll dig some out next time I visit them :) shortly after I was born they packed our life into boxes and moved down to Arizona. Every three years from that point on we moved. We would say prayers together as a family and part of everyone's prayer was "please let us go to Alaska!" I was only a baby when we left and my sisters had never been here but I think we all felt like Alaska was home, or could be home someday. We moved to Germany when I was eleven years old and while living there my dad's dream came true...we had orders for Elmendorf Air Force Base in Anchorage, Alaska. We were FINALLY going to see the place we'd all long dreamed of!
We began the looooong journey back to America in October of 2003. I remember getting up early to catch the bus from our base to the airport in Frankfurt (three hours away). I remember waiting forever in the airport for our plane and once it came time to board there was a problem. For some reason (that I can't remember) we couldn't board when we were supposed to. After a while they announced we could begin boarding and we all cheered. The plane ride was excruciatingly long!! I think we had layovers along the way...I'm pretty sure we didn't fly directly to Alaska...maybe we stopped in Colorado? I can't remember. But I do remember my glimpses of Alaska. My dad woke me so I could look out the window upon descent. He said "you're almost home"; we watched the land beneath us grow larger and the ocean fade away. Exiting the airport was one of the most exciting things I'd ever done. It was so cold!! I could see my breath! And it was only October! This new place was so amazing. But, unfortunately, our stay here didn't last for long...
In December 2003 we once again packed up and moved. My dear Grandma Shirlee was in the hospital. We moved on a humanitarian assignment down to Florida so we could be with her. On January 25, 2004 she left us to be with the Lord. I loved her so much. I still love her. My hands are shaking as I type because I still miss her. Does the pain ever go away? Can you ever stop loving someone? It's been almost ten years and I still mourn for her. It makes me wonder how the death of an even closer family member will affect me. We continued to live in Florida for a while longer, until my dad retired from the Air Force, and then drove back up to Alaska. Even though my heart still hurt I was so excited to go back that I could hardly stand it!!
We got back up here in August 2005 and quickly realized the Alaska from my parents' dreams was not the Alaska we lived in. But we still loved it :) all three of us girls went to a private school (which is where Nathaniel and I met!!) and my parents bought a brand new house. Besides longing for Alaska, I longed for a house that was my very own...a house that no one else had EVER lived in before. Every house we lived in had at least a thousand previous occupants and I wanted something that was just mine. It was so exciting!!!!!! I love that house. I still consider it mine :) so many walks around the neighborhood, rides on the four wheeler around the woods, me and Courtney jumping out my bedroom window into six feet of snow even though my parents said "don't you DARE jump out that window" ;) long car rides into town where we fought the whole way, Nathaniel coming over after church very Sunday, birthday parties, Christmas parties, all the good times, all the bad times. That house is the place I call my childhood home.
A couple years passed, Nathaniel and I got engaged, us girls all grew up a bit, my family moved down to Arizona again, Nathaniel and I got married, he joined the Air Force. Neither of us expected to see home for a long time but we ended up getting stationed back here!! Alaska is Nathaniel's home too, born and raised, and we were both so happy to be back :) it's different now than it was when we were dating. But it's different in a good way...we have our own house, our own life, we have our Caden :) Yes, sometimes it sucks living here. It's cold and it snows for nine months out the year. The summers are short and half the time there's no sun. There aren't too many places to shop but we've got some amazing places to eat around here! You won't find an abundance of chain restaurants but we like it that way :) Sometimes it's awful and I wish for a warm beach...but when Alaska's good, it's GOOD. We've made so many wonderful new memories here and now we have to say good bye once again. But there's no saying goodbye forever, not for us Bucks ;) we'll be back someday. It'll be different but always our home.
I feel like this whole post has a sad undertone but its because I'm just feeling nostalgic and ended up pouring my heart out. Next one will be much more happy :) if you LOVED the pictures of Alaska as much as I do check out more of my sweet friend's work at jenhammer.com!! These are all her pictures (except the one of my old house and the one of the three little Bucks) and she's amazing :) I adore her work!
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