The first picture is Caden at five weeks and the second picture is Isla at a few days old. In both pictures I'm sitting in a dark greenish rocker. I didn't even plan to take pictures there, it just worked out that way. I saw that chair at Target in February 2012 and fell in love. We couldn't afford it but I really wanted it. I envisioned myself rocking babies to sleep in that chair and I just knew it would complete the nursery. After I saw it I gushed about it to a fellow expectant mother (because, guys, it has an ottoman with a slide out step for your feet and it was so comfortable. I NEEDED that chair haha), who told me they already bought that same chair because the one they really wanted was out of stock, so they settled for the cheaper, crappier version. It made me feel awesome when she said that. (Insert sarcasm font there)
I still wanted that chair so badly. Nathaniel mentioned it to his grandmother and she so very graciously and lovingly purchased the chair we couldn't afford for the grandson she hadn't yet met. And in that chair I rocked my baby boy to sleep each night. Well, once we kicked him out of our bed, then I rocked him to sleep in that chair each night. I sleepily sat in that chair in the wee hours of the morning, silently begging Caden to fall back asleep, and when he finally did I'd sit there a little longer, just gazing at his tiny face, memorizing every detail. Sounds mushy gushy but it's totally true. That chair brings out my sensitive side haha I'd sit in that chair with him before naptime and feed him his bottles; he never did nurse. I'm not sure what went wrong there but he did drink mommy's milk, just in bottle form, until 10 months when I painfully dried up. And then I continued to sit in that chair and feed him his bottles--different kind of milk, same kind of love. We read books in that chair and sang songs in that chair and did flash cards in that chair. And then that chair got moved to Isla's room. And in that chair I nursed Isla to sleep each night. Except for the months that she slept in our bed :) I sang my sweet girl every princess song I could remember while we rocked in that chair. That chair represented my time with Isla girl. Since she's my second baby I never really got time with just me and her. But in that chair we had our time together. In that chair I still sing to her, every single night. As I sat in that chair with her tonight I realized that soon we'll have to move that chair out of her room. Soon I won't have a baby to rock and sing to. Soon, too soon, my babies will be grown and the chair from Target that mommy wanted so badly will be gone. But soon hasn't come yet. So until then, I'll be singing "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes" and "At Last I See the Light" to Isla every night. And I'll wrap Caden in a giant hug while I sit in that chair when he's snuck out of his room after bedtime again. Will I rock more babies in that chair? I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not. Two is enough but two isn't enough. We'll have to see what God has planned for us. But while we're waiting, I'll be rocking Caden or Isla or both in that chair.
